November 13, 2010

"YOU," "hi there," and One More Makes Three!

Since I'm going away this weekend and don't know if I'll be able to post while I'm away, here's three trolls, one fresh and two older ones, to hold you over til I get back.

This one was waiting for me when I got back from running errands last night.

"I loved your pics and your bio. I am a little older that your preferance on her states but I don't look or act my age. I love life and love to please and pamper and date only attractive Bi Ladies and not over 25. If you find me interesting, then please message me and we can take it from there. I promise that if we ever do meet you want bie displeased!."

It falls under my category of "form letter." I don't even think the guy really read my profile other than maybe a quick glance at what I'm looking for. Generic, generic, generic. Are girls really impressed by this sort of thing? I know I'm not. Also, the spelling and grammatical errors are just like nails on a chalk board to me. I'm not perfect, but at least I make an attempt.

This next one is back from July, but I still am in slight disbelief over it.

"Hi Chica,
How are you today? Hope you’re doing well.
I was wondering if you would like to do me a favor. I have a guy friend who is kind of lonely and would like some company; I’m not able to do so because I’m away until October. So would you do that, beautiful?"

My friends and I all just sort of blinked initially at this one. Really? Why can't your male friend contact me himself? Anyone seems to be able to create a dating/social profile these days, why are you doing it for him? I'm still convinced that it's actually a guy messaging others as girl. Be yourself people! Anyway, onto the third and final troll.

"Ok someone about me, I am out going, friendly and not sure what I seek other then friends first. Who knows where life will take us.

I'm sure your a very beautiful woman, very talented, and very ready for the next right guy.

I would at the very least like to be someone you can count on.

my poetry is on my website
* l i n k r e m o v e d b u t s p e l l e d o u t l i k e t h i s *

My art stuff is on:
* w w w . t h i s i s r e a l l y t i m e c o n s u m i n g . c o m *

(remove the spaces)

On a side note can I just say without offending you, I think we should chat, just something about you."

"I'm sure your a very beautiful woman"? Did you not even look at my picture? Did you just hit random search and hope that the person that you just messaged was female, let alone beautiful? Also, a minor (ok well major) pet peeve of mine is the fact that this guy just sorta assumed that I was looking/ready for a relationship. What the hell? Are you that lazy/desperate to not even care who you're messaging anymore? Because you never know who's going to get your message if that's how you're doing it. I mean, look, you ended up immortalized on my blog!

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